When I mastered the art of saying NO, it just transformed my life.

I used to say YES even when I didn’t wanted to (intentionally)

-Sometimes because of peer pressure.
-Sometimes I felt guilty that no one will like me anymore.
- Sometimes I thought I’d be judged.

It was stressful.

It made me anxious.

Not just on the personal front but also professional- I used to take up more than I can deliver, because I thought what would my boss think if I say No- Am I not responsible? Am I not taking my job seriously? Am I failure? “I don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings.”- These thoughts haunted me.

It really hit me a few years back that in an attempt to say YES, I was constantly straining myself.

That’s when I mastered the art of saying NO, when it was needed!
And it just transformed my life.

After letting go of this insanely weird people-pleasing mentality-

I was able to preserve my mental space.
I got more time for myself.
I learned self-care.
I became calmer, focused.

I no longer say yes to things that don’t excite me anymore-be it a job, a relationship, an investment or whatsoever!

People-pleasing is a survival behavior that often starts in childhood. It’s often a product of dismissive or overly strict parenting where a child would just do anything to receive compliments like, “I’m proud of you”.

When the validation is finally received, it feels so good that the behavior is reinforced and we carry it into our young adult life.

And let me say this loud and clear, I don’t feel any shame in letting go of this people-pleasing mentality. In fact, I’ve developed a healthy sense of self-worth that’s no longer attached to the approval of others!

Let me saying this loud and clear- Saying NO doesn’t make you any less human. If you want relationships rooted in truth, you’ll have to give up any identities that collapse you into niceness. People pleasing isn’t rooted in truth so how can you generate a relational foundation rooted in truth when you’re not embodying truth yourself?

You can’t!

Stop people pleasing. Be compassionate to yourself. Forgive yourself for the missteps you’ve taken. Listen to your heart’s whispers!

All in all, don’t let others box you into their idea of what they think you should be.

We mold ourselves into different roles and identities while moving through life, but many a times we stop and begin to wonder who we truly are deep within.

A confined identity is a miserable way to exist.

Which identity do you find yourselves glued t?. Let me know in the comments below?

#selfcare #happinesss #successs #contentcreator #wordsbymeenakshi